By Sana Shaikh

BHMS and Yoga Trainer

05 May 2022
Medically reviewed by
Dhanashree Padhye
MA (Psychology)
Table of Contents

Let's take an example to understand the concept behind the no-contact rule in psychology.

Eg- If one girl or a woman is in a relationship with the opposite gender and that person is not treating her well so she thinks to break the relationship with that person or remove that person from his life. So no contact rule helps the girl to overcome the problem or heal from the breakup and grow into a better individual. So most women prefer the no contact rule if they only want to remove the person in their life.

What Do You Mean By The No Contact Rule In Psychology?

The No-Contact Rule is loving yourself more than anyone else. It's all about self-explanatory and self-love. It is the period that you take to cut all ties with your ex by allowing you both to have the time and space that you need to process your breakup.

The no contact rule works most of the time if you truly want to move on from your ex or remove any other toxic person from your life which may also include your family, relatives, or friends.

Time itself plays an important role in the no contact rule.

What benefits Of The No Contact Rule?

  • The no contact rule is also beneficial for an individual one but most the women prefer it
  • It gives you the time to head and identify the new version of yourself.
  • It gives you time to reflect and recognize your potential.
  • It helps to regain control and power over your life.
  • It helps to keep away the negative emotions, and thoughts that had happened fast and concentrate more on the future life.
  • It helps you to relax and focus on betterment.
  • Helps to re-energize and regain self-esteem and improve your overall personality.
  • Erase the image of your ex and prove that you can live a happy and positive life without him.

What Are Dumpee And Dumper In No Contact Rules?

  • Dumpee is a person who is dumped or rejected romantically and the one who begs the other not to leave. They are so obsessed with that person that they won't imagine their life from a different perspective.
  • Dumpers are those people who say it is all over and they make decisions fast and don't try to talk with that person again.

What Activities Can Be Done During The No Contact Rule?

You always read that self-love is the best love so we have to implement this while performing the activities and do the things which you couldn't do while you were in a relationship.

  1. Physical Activity-You can also try to play any sports you love, you can do physical exercise, spend your time in yoga, gym, dancing, cycling or jogging.
  2. Social Activity-These activities include you can spend your time with your loved ones or interacting with people in a group or meeting your friends and hanging out with them.
  3. Relaxing Activity-That help you to relax mentally and physically which include doing yoga, meditation, spa, massage, or taking a relaxing bath.
  4. Self-improvement Activity-The reasons for the breakup can be jealousy, trust issues, and insecurities so this thought would arise again after the breakup. So we should list out the bad things and try to improve ourselves. Learn to be patient, listen more, read more, speak less, take up any course that you like, and quit a bad habit. In this process, we require time but show its effectiveness.
  5. Pursue your hobbies-The things which you stop doing at a certain time which can be dancing, sketching, or playing any sport which depends on your interest.

How To Know If The No Contact Rule Is Working?

The no contact rule simply means snapping all the contacts with your ex following a breakup.

  • Indulge in yourself and find yourself in a better way by doing self-recognition and investing more time in the thing you love.
  • Your ex tries to contact you and interact in a way that you can get him back.
  • Feel free from the toxicity of the past and think about good and positive ideas that would be good for you in the future by not repeating the mistake.
  • Your ex becomes more responsive and wants to get back together and tries to establish the perfect relationship which was not in the past.

Thus you will know that the no contact rule is working.

What Are The Stages Of The No Contact Rule?

For Dumpee-

  • Stage 1-Withdrawal

 In the starting days, you will feel low and experience mood swings, and poor sleep because your partner has dumped you and you cannot get him again.

  • Stage 2-Dejection and improvement

In this second stage, you will have the lowest level of depression in you but again you will start improving it if they contact you and don't respond either it will affect your improvement.

  • Stage 3-Recovery

In the final stage, you will start to recover or discover and think of yourself again in a good manner and start developing good hobbies and making new contacts.

For Dumper-

  • Stage 1-Relief

In some relationships dumping a partner is very hard because overall it depends on your thought and emotion so because no contact rule helps in dealing with the dumper to feel relief

  • Stage 2-Curiosity

After a couple of weeks the dumpers start thinking why my ex has not contacted me yet and why haven't they tried to come back together again.

  • Stage 3-Obsessive preoccupation

At this stage, they start thinking again and again why they have not contacted them yet and try to occupy their mind space and start checking their social media posts.

  • Stage 4-Grief

In this stage of no contact, the person realizes the pain and the break hits them badly like if our loved one has died.

  • Stage 5-Letting go

At this stage, the dumper tries to patch up again and let things go but the no contact rule makes it hard for a person who has broken the relationship they should move on.

How Does No Contact Rule Helps A Woman As An Individual?

Women as an individual are very strong but some conditions, decisions, or negative thoughts can break them and let them think differently so they always think of others and deal with that situation.

So no contact rule makes a woman decide or stand for herself by taking time to observe a thing

 in each perspective.

By using this rule we can identify our flaws and rediscover ourselves in a good way.

So that could help her in his personal as well as professional life.

She could also deal with mental issues and can increase her self-confidence.

How Do No Contact Rules Help Women To Overcome Anxiety In A Relationship?

The no contact rule plays an important role in mental issues by expressing yourself as an individual in a positive way by creating or pursuing hobbies which we cannot do in a relationship.

It keeps us physically fit and healthy by performing various activities like jogging, walking, dancing, cycling or doing yoga, meditation, due to which our mind will be freed from negative thoughts and we develop as an individual.

It also helps to explore new things by listening more and reading more and we can have trips and meet our loved ones so it creates a good impact on our behavior.

So it keeps us relaxed and increases our self-esteem and also develops our personality.


So, the no contact rule in psychology gives importance to self-love and removes toxic people from our life which can also include our loved ones, family, and friends.

We can find a better version of ourselves who doesn't depend on anyone in any situation.

It also helps to develop our physical as well as mental health.

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